The original is Antipericatametanaparbeugedamphicribrationes merdicantium, a string of Greek and possibly Hebrew prepositions followed by the Latin cribrationes, “siftings,” “of the shitters,” with a play on Mendicantium, “of the Mendicant friars.” There is of course no way to translate this adequately. 

Never before had I believed or suspected that I had a soul but just then I knew I had.  I also knew that my soul was friendly, was my senior in years and was solely concerned for my own welfare.  For convenience I called him Joe.  I felt a little reassured to know that I was not altogether alone.  Joe was helping me.

But after that he took to the habit of putting occasionally into conversations on other subjects some irrelevant remark about our need for money and the amount of it which Mathers carried in his black cash-box; sometimes he would revile the old man, accusing him of being in “the artificial manure ring” or of being dishonest in his business dealings.  Once he said something about “social justice” but it was plain to me that he did not properly understand the term.

The post-meme, however, is chaotic and creative.

We have been kissing like adolescents for the last two evenings, intensely, to the point where you begin to feel anthropological about it à la an extraterrestrial voice saying Why are those two people mashing their oral cavities together and why is one squeezing the other’s milk glands even when nothing comes out?

A man who says that Bronyism is the greatest foe, I cannot agree, for is not feminism among us and Islam at the gates, trickles heralding a flood?

Before the family moved in, they had the energy levels tested with a device that sounded like something from Ghostbusters, and found what Shanta explained as “three vortexes.”

Hamkins and Evans investigated transfinite game values in infinite chess, proving that every countable ordinal arises as the game value of a position in infinite three-dimensional chess.

My taxi snaked through bright red dust roads deeper into the forest, passing shops with Bob Marley T-shirts hung like laundry outside. Dusty signs with vague arrows pointed in different directions toward the “Psychiatric Healing Centre, 1 KM,” or the “Centre for Evolutionary Consciousness.” The deeper into the forest we got, the more futuristic the signs and buildings became: Contoured, modern glass structures sprung up from hidden crevices in the forest, with names like Aspiration, Certitude, Solitude, Discipline, and Grace.

TO: PLAYBOY

DEAR PLAYBOY ADA FRAGMENTS BEAUTIFULLY PRINTED BUT GOODNESS WHAT ILLUSTRATIONS THAT IMPROBABLE YOUNG MAMMAL AND TWO REVOLTING FROGS

NABOKOV