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It’s amazing how many of the characters in this story are named like actual Greek philosophers, and have their own individual quirks.

Like:

Taureas, an athletic place for young men.

Eros, lover of men.

Agathon, one of the greatest of the tragic poets.

Eros, lover of men, and Agathon, one of the greatest tragic poets, step into Taureas.

Eros, lover of men, and Agathon, one of the great tragic poets, step into Taureas.

Eros, lover of men, and Agathon, one of the largest tragic poets, step into Taureas.

Eros, the greatest tragic poet, and the largest tragic poet, step into Taureas.

Eros, the lover of tragically large men, and the densest tragic poet A. Gathon, step into Taureas.

Eros, the lover of men who have committed murder, step into Taureas, which is located in Athens.

It is there in Taureas, Athens that she would seek out such a man and, in the process, become enmeshed in a poetically large tragedy.

This post contains enough puns and wordplay to be its own Jabberwocky parody. I like it.

We’re all here because of something that’s supposed to be good. There’s this theory, like, physics. There’s a bunch of mathematical equations and stuff, with a bunch of random symbols for numbers, and then there’s some stuff like, “Let x equal some value,” and that’s like a definition and stuff, and other stuff, and then, “Now put in a value for x.” That’s what happens on page 1 of any math book or something. There’s some number in some equation that we’re supposed to do the put-in-a-number to. And that’s physics. And it’s the reason I’ve spent the last couple of weeks on a research project that has been nothing but equations and names and stuff. Physics: The theory of everything. You’re supposed to put in numbers to get things going. And there’s a lot of random numbers, and I get a lot of them, and I get a bunch of them from numbers, and I look at them for a while, and I do math with them. And sometimes they’re really big numbers, and I think, “Ah, physics: It is physics,” and sometimes they’re like, “Yes, no, that must be physics,” and sometimes they’re like, “It is a thing, and then a thing is physics, but then it’s physics,” but mostly they’re numbers, and I guess they do physics. And my job is to learn the names for the numbers, and then learn some names for the numbers of names, and then find out where the numbers of names lead, and then find some number names of numbers of names that will lead to the truth of physics, if it has truth, and then learn the names of the names of the truth, and then make sure the names of names of names of names of names of names of numbers will lead somewhere else. But not to the place where it turns into, like, a bad science, but rather, the only place.

That’s how it is with us. We’re made of names of numbers and some physics for no reason, but the place where physics starts makes physics, and then the physics of names of physics has a place where it is the only place. And my job is to put in names, and make sure the names don’t make the place where physics starts, which we would all die, into a place with a thing called a “cat.”

(I was thinking about this because of the “cat” again, and how I’ve heard, on television, that the name for this evil cat is like “evil cat” or something. It’s like a word.)

So here is my question for you guys: Why would it be so terrible if someone found some way to make a place where the physics of names of physics started? Wouldn’t it be nice? Wouldn’t it be cool, not to be evil but to be a cool cat? I can’t imagine that it would be an evil cat – how can an evil cat be more than a name for an evil? We’re all here because of some physics of names of physics, and who knows what might happen? Physics of names of physics, like some sort of physics, and there’s a physics of names of physics and a physics of names of names of physics, and if it was the last word then I would think that that would be something so cool that people would fight for it, and we would all be cat people, and physics would be physics of names of names of names of physics, but there are a lot of other things besides physics that are physics of names of names of names of physics, and I don’t think I would die, and the only reason I would maybe, if they put a thing called a “cat” in, it wouldn’t be the only reason that they would die, and there are a lot of other physics-of-names-of-names-of-names-of-numbers things in physics, like the physics of names of names of names of names of names of physics, but it would be like a thing, and then maybe other physics-of-names-of-names-of-names-of-numbers things, and so I would die, and then the cat thing would be put in, but then what would it be? Would it be a cat in a physics of names of names of names of names of names of names of physics, because a physics of names of names of names of names of names of names of names of numbers, with a cat in it, would make it a physics, and then it would be a physics of names of names of names of names of names of names of names of names of physics, with a cat in it, but that makes it a physics of names of names of names of names of physics, with a cat in it, and then it is like physics of names of names of names of names of physics, with a cat in it, and then we all die, but not before we get to try to make physics of names of names of names of names of physics, with a cat in it, and physics of names of names of names of physics, with a cat in it. And then we’d have a physics, and we’d all die and we’d all live, and there’d be a physics, and then it wouldn’t be a physics, and then it’d be like a name of a physics, and we’d all die, but physics, and then it’d be a physics of names of names of physics, and then it’d be physics of names of names of physics, and then it’d be like a name of a name of a name of a physics, and then we’d all die. And then there’d be a physics, and then a physics of names of names of names of physics, and then it would be a physics of names of names of names of names of names of physics, and then we’d all die, and there’d be a name of names of names of names of names of physics, and then it would be a physics of names of names of names of names of names of names of physics, and then we’d all die, and then physics of names of names of names of physics, and then there’d be physics of names of names of names of physics, and then it’d be names of names of physics, and then it’d be names of names of physics, and then it would be names of physics, and then there’d be physics of names of physics, and then there’d be names of physics, and then there’d be physics of physics, and then there’d be physics of physics, and then it’d be physics of physics, and then physics, physics and physics, physics of physics, physics of physics, physics of physics, physics of physics.

“Physics of physics,” I’m saying. Physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics, and the physics of physics of physics of physics, and the physics of physics of physics, and the physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of. “Physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics, and then physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics, and then physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of. "Physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of. "Physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics, of physics of physics of physics of physics of. "Physics of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics, of physics of physics of physics of physics of physics.”

50.000 feet of bubble wrap. It doesn’t sound like a lot, but then you learn that I had to wrap all of the air out of my apartment. This is actually an easy task to get into – I’m sure you can figure out why. The only difficulty with the task is that one has to do it while suspended, at a time when my apartment is not. In such a state, I must be doing something to the air. It is not an easy problem, but it is an easy enough problem that I’ll get into it shortly.

It’s also important to know that no one who had any claim on my apartment could have helped me. The bubble wrap was given to me by a company – a company whose entire purpose is the bubble wrap. They make the bubble wrap in their factory and then hire out its distribution and installation. They did not want to be involved with me at all. The only person who could have helped me was my landlord, and he had better things to do. No matter how much you want a job done well, if you are a contractor you are going to get stuck with the task of doing it. And it is my good fortune that no one thought of me. There would have been all sorts of trouble if my landlady had been around.

And let me say that she was an interesting person to be around – I could never decide what to make of her. She was always in the office when I came home, always dressed impeccably. Her presence was never overwhelming, though: it always felt more like I had been introduced to a friend. She had a few children of her own and they would come over to play with the cat, and I would just watch. It is hard to be bored when you are around children, especially when there are so few adults around. The feeling of something missing in a room only compounds the difficulty, of course, but it’s a tough challenge.

On the whole I was a pretty positive person in those days, and I could not help thinking how nice it was that someone was always here to see me, to take the place of the person who would never be. It would have been easy to feel that way once, maybe, but the people around me were always on and on and on, working or taking care of things in their time, and I was working too, and the sense that there was something there to be done faded, and with it the illusion of contentment.

I’m not saying this was a happy time in my life, exactly. But there was a lightness to it, a sort of half-dormancy of expectation. Of course there wasn’t much room to be alive then – we were all in the bubble wrap – but there was enough there. If I had to point to one moment as a high point in my life, I would choose that moment, as I was beginning to wrap up the bubble wrap: I had just finished making a phone call, and I was on the phone for a long time, and the bubble wrap was wrapped up. The bubble wrap had been a good thing to wrap, and it had helped to take me a long way: when I woke up after the call, I remembered wrapping the bubble wrap, and that made me feel okay.

If I had been forced to point to a low point, I might point to that moment: there was the feeling of wrapping the bubble wrap, and that’s when I had to go back to the apartment, and there was nothing to do there, no bubble wrap to wrap, except the feeling of wrapping the bubble wrap (which, by the way, I wrapped up in something like 12 minutes). It wasn’t like that in the end: I still have a feeling of contentment and lightness from those 12 minutes, more than from any of my other bubble wrap, but I don’t think it is the best time to point to as a low point.

I’d also point to the call with my therapist: when I made the call and had my talk, I felt like I hadn’t been in the bubble wrap for quite a while, but I was sure that things would be just as comfortable soon. Sure, I had to wrap the bubble wrap, but it wasn’t anything serious. It just took me a while to remember that I couldn’t be in there all the time. The talk made me feel better.

In the end, I don’t remember any of the feelings I have when wrapped up in bubble wrap very well. It’s all a bit vague, after a few months in this void. The only one I can point to was just wrapping the bubble wrap one final time: when I woke up after that, it was a bit different. It was easier to be there. The feeling of contentment persisted: I did not have a lot of energy to do much of anything once I was home, but I did not have the energy to work either, which was good, since there really wasn’t that much work to be done.

All the other bubbles were just floating, one after the other. And I remember I was very, very happy. I was still a long way from my first real girlfriend and from my second real girlfriend, but I was happy. I had done something, something important: something that wasn’t just floating around, it really was wrapped up.

Of course, it wasn’t really wrapped up. The bubble wrap still remained. But that was my little secret: the bubble wrap was not the real thing. The only thing I was wrapping was myself. It was as though the bubble wrap were the bubble wrap and I was wrapping my apartment, and I was a little guy in a room with a lot of walls. And I was having fun and it made me happy. It was a little bit like what it must be like to be on heroin: not that I’ve ever done heroin, but that’s how I felt, when I was wrapped up in bubble wrap. It was great, really. I was so happy.

Then came the day the bubble wrap got unwrapped. It was like a dream, after all – the bubble wrap felt wrong, it felt as though the bubble wrap had never been there – but all the wrapping was really for naught: what was it for, if there was no bubble wrap to wrap?

The day came when I had to unwrap myself, and it was hard. It was not just unwrapping myself, but unwrapping the bubble wrap, and it was all for naught, all of it was a dream. I had not been wrapped in the bubble wrap – I did not have any bubble wrap to wrap myself in – and there was nothing for me to wrap myself in. It was all just bubbles and space. I did not have any bubble wrap to wrap myself in, and I was going to unwrap myself.

Well, this is getting pretty far-fetched. I wrapped up the bubble wrap and I unwrapped myself. What else could I do?

Well, I wrapped up the bubble wrap and I unwrapped myself. I have wrapped myself in bubble wrap before, but this time was different. It was not the same bubble wrap. The wrapping was different. The bubble wrap was full of different things, and it was not the same thing. I am not supposed to be here, not supposed to be wrapped up in bubble wrap. I am not supposed to be full of bubbles. So I am unwrapping myself. I am taking everything out. I’m just going to go to sleep, here, and not be wrapped up in bubble wrap anymore.

But what did I say, that the wrapping is for nothing if there’s no bubble wrap to wrap in? This is how it is in my life, that it’s for nothing, that I do not exist. What is there to unwrap in this empty bubble wrap? I am not supposed to be wrapped up in this bubble wrap, but what else is there? So I unwrap myself, and all there is, in this bubble wrap, is my empty bubble, a room where I should not be.